Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Booth Tarkington | The Magnificent Ambersons | 1918

Dear George,

Be careful, okay? When you do things without thinking, those things come back at you with an equal thoughtlessness and ruthlessness. I always remember the advice Lucy gave you during that fight when she explained to you that people have their noses in the air, how "Little Mr. Pembroke" was six-foot-three. Treat everyone with respect and everyone will treat you the same. Even your mother. I also have to say that even though there were times in the book that I liked you, it would never work between us. You are too used to girls looking radiant when you dance with them.

Politely,
Anne

Monday, August 30, 2010

Various Authors | The Old Testament | 1000 B.C.

Dear Noah,

I know that many people have asked you about this, but what about fish? And if birds flew away, did they always come back? I'm guessing not, since the dove that returned with an olive branch was such a big-deal sign of land ho (also, dove and olive branch are both symbols of peace--isn't this a little redundant?). And what about animals that got down and dirty with each other? Didn't you end up with a gigantic mess of zorses and mules and gironkeys and whatever else? And plants? Was there another ark in charge of plants? I am not skeptical, just real confused.

Sincerely,
David Wallerstein

Monday, August 23, 2010

Suzanne Collins | The Hunger Games | 2008

Dear Peeta,

I'm not exactly sure where you are right now, but I hope this
letter finds you alive and well. I've been thinking about you a lot lately
and I can't wait to find out what happened to you after all that chaos. I
sincerely hope you can win over Katniss, she's stubborn, but trust me,
there's something there with you two that no one else could ever fully
understand, so use that! You deserve happiness and you're a truly
wonderful person, thanks for showing me people like you do exist.

Love,
Sarah Blake

Monday, August 16, 2010

Judy Blume | Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret | 1970

Dear Margaret,

God sent me a message to give to you.

Don't be sorry. You're a good kid. Everything will work out just fine.

Sincerely,
VL Sheridan

Frederick Barthelme | Waveland | 2009

Dear Vaughn,

I'm not clear that you like buildings, let alone love them. Isn't that a requirement for an architect? Also, you seem to have questionable taste in women. Is it part of giving up? Or are you reacting to how perfect your mother was? Greta might've killed someone, Gail went and got beaten by a guy who wrote on her neck. I am not a great woman, but I'm a great woman, if you know what I mean. Maybe we'd get along. Let's hop in the car and say.

Sincerely,
Abbie

Friday, August 6, 2010

Margaret Wise Brown | Goodnight Moon | 1947

To the Quiet Old Lady Whispering Hush,

You’re no lady. You’re a bunny. Have we become so politically correct that we can no longer call a bunny a bunny?

Sincerely,
Katherine Rosman

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Stephen King | The Stand | 1978

Dear Randall Flagg,

Ooh, I'm scared!

Love,
Lee Ann

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Harper Lee | To Kill A Mockingbird | 1960

Dear Scout's Mother,

I don't think you're ever named. Are you? You passed when Scout was two. That's a terrible age to lose a child. You lost Atticus, too, but many people marry a man or a woman with the knowledge that they will not always be by their side. People say it's easier to die before a child than to have a child die before you, but when a baby's that young and you pass away, it's like both things are happening at once. So did you watch from where you were? Did you see what happened to Scout and Jem and Dil? One thing, of course, is that even though Atticus had right on his side, I wonder if he would have been looked at differently if he had a strong, pretty wife next to him. Maybe you could have calmed Bob Ewell. At least you could have sat your daughter on her lap and heard her story.

Missing you,
Linda Peters

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Louise Fitzhugh | Harriet the Spy | 1964

Dear Harriet,

I couldn't agree more. Sport was a little old woman. In fact, he was a little old woman right down to the moment that he objected to your characterization. What a wrinkled old prune. He should have a walker. I don't really understand why you can't write private things about friends in a private book. You should. That way you get to work out your thoughts. Friends aren't perfect. They are just people you like or love, which means they are just people, which means that they are not perfect. Say hello to Ole Golly for me.

Sincerely,
Jeannie

Monday, August 2, 2010

Will Self | The Sweet Smell of Psychosis | 1996

Dear Richard,

The last time I was in London, I didn't get the chance to meet "Pablo," and I was wondering if you could put in a good word for me at the Sealink? I'm good people, I promise. Of course, I wouldn't be surprised if you resolved to never again darken the place's doorstep, given the whole Ursula/Bell thing-- talk about a tryst!-- but look, I usually stay in my father’s bedsit in Forest Hill, and the people around there wouldn't know Pablo from Sanjeev, so I really need the connect.

Thanks,
Patrick Michael John

P.S. What kind of meds do they have you on now? Just curious.