Victor Appleton | Tom Swift and His Electric Locomotive | 1922

Dear Tom,

You were ahead of your time. I don't just mean that you were ahead of your time as an inventor, although the speeds you got out of the train were pretty impressive: 120 mph is still in the upper bound of high-speed trains on real tracks, though if you go maglev you can get out over 250. I mean you were ahead of your time for being involved in breathtaking adventure stories that also sound a little like porn. I have a copy of this, one of your most exciting adventures. I opened it to a random page and this is what I read: "There was a mighty jerk that brought a shout from Ned Newton's lips and a grunt from Mr. Damon." Sounds to me like maybe there's three ducks in a pond, if you know what I mean. Or three hot dogs in a bun. Or three sparklers in a glove compartment. A few years before you made the electric locomotive, there was a book called "Tom Swift and His Big Tunnel." Indeed.

Yours,
Manny Johnson